Somehow the least appealing boxes to unpack are ones that have a random assortment of paperwork. With every move there are boxes that have a hodgepodge of items and I’ll regularly open the box, look in, see the smattering of items and close it right back up with no desire to sort through all that randomness. Well, the purging bug bit last week and I spent a good bit of time sorting through those boxes. I got through at least 11 and have 5 of them refilled with items for a yard sale. Not bad for a day’s work.
As I sorted I found lots of old files…sermons, seminary papers, tax documents, cards, letters and more. One of the things I found was a 5 page document outlining the list of egregious (in my opinion) actions of a former boss. I had written the list at the end of my employment there and shared it with our supervisor so that if something happened in the future, our supervisor would know it wasn’t an isolated incident. This particular person had a habit of being hurtful, mean spirited, and spiteful. I turned in one copy and saved one for myself. And as I sifted through paperwork I found those pages all over again. A skeleton of sorts that hangs in out in the closet.
Over the years, I recovered it a handful of times. I read through the report and am often surprised at just how bad it was. My memory has had a way of softening the harshness of those months under his awful leadership. But when I re-read my notes and am reminded of the pain I endured. Each time I’ve been reluctant to throw it out. It’s seemed necessary to hold onto it.
But this time was different. This time it seems I need to be done reliving those wounds. At this point I know it was hard to work with him and that he was awful to me. And that’s enough. I don’t need to keep revisiting the details.
So I bid farewell to that ugly old skeleton.