Critters

Critters are not my friend. Animals yes. Critters no. I started my week arriving home to 2 gigantor rat traps...great. The trustee who did new tile floors and counter tops told me one ran across his foot when he moved the fridge. Fabulous. Boy does that make my day. Well, day two the rat trap made my day when it held one of our furry little non-friends. I quietly hoped he was the only one and that the other trap would remain empty. I still clean up like a crazy woman just in case. But a girl can hope, right?!

Then the telephone guy came and told me that a bunch of the cords under the house were chewed up by rats. Sweet. So, I relent on my dream of being rat free and go buy rat poison. I know--it's not very ecological or anything, but really...they're rats. If it were a 'posum or a 'coon, I'd opt for the humane route, but when it's a nasty little critter, sorry, it's not gonna happen.

So, as I go to throw my rat poison under the house (these things are like gummy snacks for rats and claim the rats will chew through the wrapping), I reach for one of the vent covers and what do a see but a little scaly face staring back at me and a long tail to add a cherry on top. I shirked back thinking it was a snake and then tried to peer through the wire to see how big it was and then realized it was a lizard--not my favorite but worlds better than a snake. So I shook the grate and got the lizard to move so I could throw my rat gummies under the house.

Then this afternoon I was near one of the grates and went to sneak a peek because the package of rat candy hadn't landed properly and it was GONE. Yep. Gone. G-O-N-E. Which, is a good thing I suppose b/c it means it was taken somewhere to be eaten, hopefully by every rat on the block so I never have to see one again, but also creepy that the rat candy was dragged away to some darker part of the underside of my house. Ick.

Finally, tonight, I went out to dinner with 4 ladies from the church who were an absolute hoot! They were fabulous. After dinner we went back to one of their homes and shared stories for hours and then topped it off with ice cream. At the end of the night I asked for the bathroom and what did I see as I turned the corner of the hallway but a 10" lizard making its way into one of the bedrooms. We chased it around and tried to scare it out and only succeeded in making it shed it's tail, which then wiggled like a little worm. I hoped, for her sake, that we could shush it out of the house and she could rest easy, but we failed.

Why can't the critters stay way away from my house? Oh yeah, probably because my house is way up in their territory...but seriously--NO MORE CRITTERS!