Saturday, March 17, 2007

what was I thinking?

After a short ride to Claremont with a colleague friend last night where he thoroughly enjoyed joking about the "Mr. Perfect" doll who hangs in my car (a "man" my mother gave me since I do not have an active dating life), we spent a couple hours with two other friends joking and talking. It came out that I used to be a cheerleader (not a past time you would suspect simply by looking at me, not even necessarily once you know me). The guys decided it would be great if I did a cheer for them. Yeah, whatever. A little further into the night C was telling jokes and I was asked to take a turn. I am NOT a joke teller. Never have been. Never will be. I pleaded to get out of it and the alternative was that I do a cheer. Now, you take your pick--telling the one bad joke you know, or doing a cheer in front of three relatively new friends who will be colleagues for 40 years, in a crowded room with live jazz....tell me, just which one would you have gone for??? I went for the joke. I warned them, but they insisted. And then they sat there in stunned silence at just how bad my joke was. A laughed I think more out of pain at how poor my skills were than anything else, the other two couldn't even muster courtesy laughs. yep. it was that bad. The consensus was I should have gone with the cheer. Maybe next time guys. Maybe next time.

So this morning, I sat next to A for another riveting day at our conference, and he starts talking about setting me up on dates. Huh? Did I say I needed a date? I asked if he was any good at setting people up seeing as how I have endured my fair share of bad dates. He wasn't sure. Then this evening, apparently prompted by my earlier conversation I linked to an online dating site. All you have to do is login with virtually no information to look at possible dates in your area. Why did I do this? It only seems to bring out the shallow "first impression" woman in me. Can people really find a date simply by scanning pics to see who is attractive and then see if their profile says anything interesting? Does this work? I clicked on one, he's a publicist--read: marketing, of course he sounds good. He works at selling things. I do not. So the other horror of online dating--I think the reason (well one of the many anyway) why I have avoided such sites like the plague is that they require that I too develop a profile to sell myself. Uh....I think not. Really, now that I have my wits about me, it really creeps me out....I know that sounds like a harsh judgment on those who do it, it really isn't. I get how hard it is to find a date and why not try and use the internet to provide some dating options.?..and yet I can only see such an endeavor going horribly, horribly wrong for me....

So apparently it's back to "Mr. Perfect". And maybe somewhere along the way A will use his skills and set me up with someone who's willing to date an ex-cheerleader who CANNOT tell a joke! =)


David said...

maybe you just ought to run around cheering others on, in public spaces as much as possible. I think this will cure the curious, joust the jokes and attract a man - one that could handle you at any rate.

chai said...

omg. you were a cheerleader?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!

i'm stunned.

Andrew said...

Swing music, not jazz. :P
Decent delivery, poor material. :D
Awesome woman, no date needed for affirmation, identity, or satisfaction. :)
"Perfect man", ultimate cuddler...